Kerry Katona giving Katie Price relationship advice again, still not sure who's worse

Kerry Katona shouldn't be giving advice to other people at this time of year. She's a capricorn you see, which means that her moon is full, and also, there's a star in Uranus that's been blocking her spirit guide from communing with the Northern Lights for the past three crescents, undoubtably leaving her feeling both drained and selef-involved.

Of course it doesn't help that Katie Price, being a pisces, is unlikely to be receptive to hypocritical bullshit at least until next Tuesday, and you also mustn't forget that the infamous litigation dragon she's had rising in her gamma quadrant since she was about 18, will mean that any kind of insult at all could result in her children finding themselves the recipients of an unexpected cashwindfall.

Despite this, Kerry still felt she should give OK! Magazine her opinion on exactly what's going on with Katie at the moment. It's hard to decide exactly which one of them to be more withering about, although in the end around 78 percent of readers went with Kerry:

"Katie Price has been compared to a meerkat, which is hilarious!

"Mind you, Katie Price has always had cat eyes which draw you in. 

"I’m glad she’s single, she should stay that way for a while because keeping herself occupied will do her the world of good. As much as everyone slags Katie off, I can relate to her. 

"She married Alex Reid on the rebound from Peter Andre like I married Mark Croft after Brian McFadden. 

"She has this big persona saying how untouchable she is but I think she’s really insecure and needs a man to love her. 

"I used to be that way."

Used to, everyone. Used to. Don't worry though, Kerry's still got her problems. A major one of which is what she's going to do when OK! terminates her contract for refusing to go an entire week without talking about her weight or her drugs. Which will be fairly shortly, we'd assume:

"The press always criticise you whether you’re too fat or too thin, but so what if I’ve put on a few pounds? 

"I was on This Morning last week with Kate Thornton and a beautiful young girl called Megan who had battled anorexia – surely that puts things into perspective. 

"People should get over themselves, it’s not like I’ve fallen off the wagon and shoving cocaine up my nose. 

"I’m finally in a good relationship, I’m happy and content, so kiss my big fat arse"

Yeah, naysayers. Stop saying nay.